How to get a woman: online dating tips
This website gives guidance on how to get a woman using popular online dating sites. There are online dating tips for men, whether you want to just have some fun from online dates, get a special lady, or you want to get a wife. From how to decide which dating sites to join, to writing online dating profiles, to making your first dates.
We suggest you read through the sites pages in order, to get maximum benefit from the online dating tips presented here. We wish you the very best in your quest to find a woman.
Glyn and Steve
First to that all important question: does online dating work? Can you really get a woman through an online dating site?
does online dating work? (can you really get a woman online? you sure can!)
Nine months ago, following the breakdown of a disastrous marriage, I returned to the UK after seven years abroad. I hadn't chatted anybody up or been on a date for so long I initially thought I was going to end up some saddo sat in the corner of the local pub. Fortunately I spent a few days with my brother who introduced me to internet dating.
I was a bit sceptical at first until he showed me some of the women he had dated! It seemed I could get a woman after all!
For a while I had a lot fun with online dates and met some interesting women. Then I met 'The One'. Now I have a fantastic girlfriend and we are busy planning the rest of our lives together.
Whilst I wouldn't say I was ugly, I'm a pretty ordinary looking guy, well advanced in middle age. If I can do it so can you... Believe me there is somebody out there for all of you. As an ex told me long ago "For every Jack there's a Jill."
The brother who initially put me onto online dating, also had lots of fun meeting women, and now has met someone special too. My sister has recently married a man she met online. We know many other people who've used online dating sites with success. Some of them are having the time of their lives. Some of my online dating advice recently helped a young acquaintance of mine to get a woman, a big boost to his confidence and happiness.
Take a positive attitude to online dating. Don't put too much pressure on yourself to get a woman immediately, especially if it's a while since you last dated. Take your time. If you put some thought and effort into your online dating you too can learn how to get a woman! Online dating can work for you, if you work at it.
to get a woman you need to put in some time and effort
Knowing how to get a woman isn't a skill we're automatically born with, it's one most of us learn, usually by trial and error, through our successes and our mistakes. With a little effort you can tip the odds in your favour, and I am here to help you do that. All I ask in return is that when you decide you are going to join your dating sites go through my affiliate links on this page. I am promoting only those that have been tried and tested by myself or my friends.
If you want to get a woman then it helps if you have some idea about how they think. One way to find out what women think and want is to actually talk to them about it! That in itself is a good online dating tip - chat with women, even ones you don't plan to date. Exchange dating experiences, be chatty and friendly. Laugh with them, commiserate with them. It costs only a little time, can be fun and you might learn something useful!
The biggest complaint from the women I talked to and dated was that men didn't seem to put much effort into online dating. After looking at the profiles of the guys on a variety of online dating sites I could see where they are coming from! If you want to get a woman you have to think about what sort of woman you want, and how you are going to attract her, through your online dating profile.
What are you looking for?
You may or may not know the answer to this one. I thought I was looking for a bit of fun and ended up falling in love with someone I wish I had met 15 years ago! However not all dating sites are the same and you will certainly be frustrated if you are looking in the wrong place!
Whatever your motivation there is a website that is going to suit you. As an example there are a number of sites dedicated to casual sexual encounters, such as BeNaughty and IllictEncounters. If your intention was to get a wife, whilst i wouldn't rule out the possibility of these sites entirely, I think you would be far more suited to Match, Zoosk, MatchAffinity or eHarmony. My own sister Janet recently married Dave, a man she met on an online dating site.
popular online dating sites where you could get a woman
Check out this table which should give you an idea of suitable sites to get where you want to be....
Looking for your soul mate? try *****************************.com Wanting to just chat over the internet? Looking for no strings attached sex? Just want to be friends? Wanting an extra marital affair?
writing online dating profiles to get a woman
If you want to get a woman then you must master the art of writing online dating profiles!
Sometimes men put up photos and leave their online dating profiles blank, or just write a couple of rather bland sentences that tell women almost nothing about them. It's not a good way to approach online dating! It gives the impression that either you don't care, or you're so vain that you think your good looks are all there is.
Do your online dating profiles say "Ask and I'll tell you anything you want to know"? Guess what? When women see profiles like this they tend to not want to know!
Do you, in all honesty and modesty, write "I'm new to online dating and don't really know what to write here",' or "I'm really no good at writing these things"? What impression do you think this gives? Women might just think you lack confidence and imagination. There's a lot of men to choose from and chances are they will look at the next profile!
How about "GSOH. I like nights in with a bottle of wine and DVD, nights out on the town." (GSOH is good sense of humour, for those who don't know). OK, so an improvement, but... this really is same old same! So MANY online dating profiles are a slight elaboration on this basic information! Let's face it if we all had this great sense of humour it's a wonder the streets aren't full of laughter!
Men who write profiles like any of the above are the ones who'll tell you online dating is a waste of time, and you'll never get a woman that way. Don't be one of those kind of men.
If you're serious that you want to get a woman then you seriously need to put some thought and effort into writing your online dating profiles. Get some confidence here - you're as good as the next man, you have interests and life experiences. Perhaps you have a job, a family, hobbies, have been places, done things, read books, spend time online (well you're here reading this anyhow). What are the highlights of your life? What empassions you? It's all potential raw material for your online dating profiles. If you really don't have good stuff there already then it's time to take up a hobby and get a life! Dancing is a great way to attract women, if you want a personal tip - anyone can do it, honest!
Your online dating profiles are a key to successful online dating. They are worth some time and effort! You've got to put some sparkle and shine into your online dating profile. Women (unlike many men) don't automatically go for looks over all else - if your profile fizzes, or makes them laugh, it may be enough to pique their interest.
A few online dating tips if you want to get a woman:
1. Make it positive! Absolutely do not moan, especially about other women! Prospective women do not want to hear about the bitch that let you down last time. They do not want to know that "it's not fair 'cause no one ever gives you a chance" (either in your profile or in personal messages). Trust me plenty of men make just such mistakes - don't be one of them!
2. Be up front about what you're looking for, both in a woman and what kind of relationship (casual, serious, see how it goes and so on). Not only does it increase the chances of you getting what you want, it means you don't waste your and other peoples time, if they want something else. One caution here though, don't be so prescriptive that you block possible good matches even before you consider them. Sure you need to be selective and filter out the definite "no, nos" but don't be so narrow and unrealistic you never get a woman.
3. If you are witty and can write it then you can really make your profile stand out, if not use humour with some caution. If you do have a good sense of humour, and who would say they don't, what kind is it? Do you like satire? Have a dry sense of humour? Like particular comedians, TV programmes or humorous books? Or what? Be more specific than the catch all "GSOH".
4. Before you sit down to write your online dating profiles look at other peoples. What is good about them? Which ones stand out? Why? Get ideas! Then write, and if necessary rewrite! Put it down and look the next day - is it good enough? Ask someone elses opinion, get the input of whomever will help - they may come up with something you haven't thought of!
I said it at the start - but it needs saying again: If you want to get a woman then you must master the art of writing online dating profiles!
Will your photo get a woman - or will she pass you by?
Your picture can make or break you! Women are going to be scrolling through hundreds of pictures and only looking at each photo for a second or two. This is your big chance to make a first impression!
Rule number one is that if you want to get a woman through online dating you MUST have at least one photo. This is so important. I have yet to meet anybody who contacted a photo less member of any dating site, unless they were looking for an extra-marital affair. In my opinion without a photo you are wasting your time and highly unlikely to get a woman through online dating.
My tip here is to gain a march on the competition by posting a number of photos. There should be at least one showing your face clearly and another of the whole you. I know that many women surf through the male members and only look at those with more than one photo. I certainly used to do the same when looking for women. Some online dating sites vet photos and reject any that do not show the face clearly.
The quality of photos on online dating sites is generally abysmal! Holding your phone at arms length, or taking a picture of yourself in the mirror just wont do! If you can afford it invest in a professional photographer session - it makes a real difference.
If you can't afford a pro then get somebody to take dozens of pictures of you, wearing different clothes, in different poses and different places. If you don't know anyone then go out and ask strangers if they will take your picture - most people (especially older people) are pleased to be asked, just don't give your phone or camera to anyone who looks like they might run off with it!
It would be advantageous to invest in a good haircut and have a shave before your photo session too.
When you have all your photos get a female (Mum , sister, barmaid, Aunt, workmate, neighbour etc.) to pick out the ones that they feel show you at your best.
There are a few things about your photo that might actually decrease the chance you will get a woman through online dating.
Whilst your pride and joy might be your 1955 Standard Vanguard or your Honda Fireblade there are a limited number of women with the same interests. Photos of you leaning against or caressing same will more than likely put more women off than they attract. Likewise pictures of you with your arm round another woman - I kid you not I have seen them! And the ones where a former partner has been scissored out of the picture! On the other hand you with a cuddly cat or dog on your lap can attract certain types of women, as long as they can still see you clearly.
How would you feel if you got to date and found the woman who turned up was nothing at all like her photo? Right, so don't do the same thing to them! If you put up a photo that's 20 years out of date you better have aged well.
Finally (and even on "adult" dating sites) women do not want to only see a photo of what's in your trousers - no matter how magnificent you consider it!
Selecting and being selected
OK! We've chosen some online dating websites, got good photos up and a decent fist of a profile. We could just sit back and wait for the rush... In fact it can tell you a bit about the sort of women who are attracted to you. Surprisingly if you are an overweight 55 year old there wont be many 25 year old super-models amongst them -if there are it's likely to be a scam, more on that later. Try to be realistic. Whilst a lot of women like older men don't aim for women who are too young for you, or you will get poor results.
If you really want to get a woman then you need to do something about it - don't just sit back and hope!
Now it's your turn... You will find that many sites offer blanket 'icebreakers' such as 'Hi how are you' etc or 'winks' - my advice is don't bother. Especially with the icebreakers women assume you can't be bothered to write a personal message and they pass you by. When you find someone you like the look and sound of, send them a message. You might wink as well, but do not just wink! Your initial message does not have to be a long one, something like the following is good for an initial approach...
"Hi, I just read your profile and it looks as though we have a lot in common. Have a look at mine and if you are interested, maybe we could chat?
I look forward to hearing from you.
Regards your name"
That's all it takes. You wont get hits every time but you are more in control. The women who reply will be the ones you want to meet.
chat her up: get that first date
When you are chatting on the internet with a possible future girlfriend, bear in mind what is on her profile and what her interests are. Open her profile in another window so you can refer to it. Imagine you are actually having a physical conversation - you have 2 ears and 1 mouth try, use them in that ratio! Take an interest in her, ask her questions and respond to what she is saying. Tell her good stuff about yourself. The advantage you have here over a face to face meeting is that you have thinking time. In the past if the conversation got onto a subject I was a bit hazy on I would text brb (be right back) then Google it. Not so that I could pretend to be an expert, but so that I could keep up with her and show an informed interest.
We are now in an area where you are somewhat on your own, if you are lucky she might suggest meeting up, otherwise you are going to have to take the plunge. Now this can happen the first time you chat or it might be after weeks of it. You can easily wreck things by waiting too long or asking too soon. It should become evident if there is any spark between you and sometimes it's good to suggest a phone call ... just say "I have a picture of you and I know a lot about your interests but I'm intrigued to know what you sound like. I would understand if you don't want to give me your phone number but I will happily give you mine and you could withhold yours-how about it?" Or perhaps you could use Skype if you both have it.
If the phone call happens you are more or less there... Ask to meet her.
My tactic here was to let them choose the venue and suggest a daylight meeting if possible, I would stress that I was doing this for their security. Also if it is a meet for lunch or coffee or a drink then it is easier to say goodbye fairly rapidly if one or the other of you is not happy.
One thing... Be wary of anyone who seems too good to be true! Ask yourself why a 22 year old page 3 look alike wants you to contact them. They are more likely after what's in your back pocket than what's in your trousers. NEVER send any one money for 'train fare' etc.
With any luck you are now on your first date, don't get despondent if it doesn't work out. Just keep trying and you will find your confidence growing. Treat the looking for dates as a bit of an adventure - meet people online, talk to them, exchange stories, laugh with them and commiserate with them. Have some fun on the way, and eventually you will not just get a woman, but meet the right woman for you. She is out there somewhere :)
I wish you as much success with your online dating as I have had.
GOOD LUCK AND HAPPY DATING
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